These dating conversation tips will help prevent ‘foot-in-mouth’ conversations on dates by following this simple guide, the only 9 tips you will ever need to have free-flowing fun conversations…
So you exchanged numbers and organized to meet up for coffee.
Now you’re nervous. What will I do? What will I say?
“OH GOD. Will there be an awkward silence?!”
Relax. This really simple ‘Dating Conversation Tips’ guide is all you need to start having fun conversations on dates.
People always only seem to think of themselves. So if you are feeling nervous before going on a date, remember that the other person is human too. They are probably just as nervous.
To help you combat the awkward silences that often occur during dates, here are the only 9 dating conversation tips you will ever need:
1. Avoid lots of logical, boring questions.
“What engine size is your car?”, “How fast is your computer processor?”. These questions do not engage girls’ interest as much as guys. Focus on fun and emotional topics as they are more interesting to both of you.
When either asking questions or answering them, the 5 senses are a great thing to keep in mind. How loud was it? What did it look like? What did it smell like? How did it taste? What did it feel like to touch?
Obviously the entire conversation doesn’t need to be emotional, but if you find yourself getting bored from the conversation, try switching to more emotional topics.
2. This is not an interview. Repeat. This-is-not-an-interview!
It’s perfectly fine to ask questions. Just don’t use questions as your only conversation technique.
Do ask questions, but alternate between using questions and making statements to engage your date. You will notice that this is what friends do when having a conversation.
Example: Question: “what do you do for a living?” That same question in statement form: “I bet you’re a nurse” Question: “How many brothers and sisters do you have?” That same question in statement form: “I’m guessing you are not an only child.”
3. Ask questions that you would like to answer yourself (to demonstrate cool things about yourself to your date).
(I think this is my favorite of all the dating conversation tips)
The purpose is simple. People often ask you the same question you just asked.
Example: Question: “What’s the most fun thing you’ve done in the last week?” Her: “Well, I went out on Friday night with friends, what about you?” You: “This sounds crazy, but I go to a baseball game with friends and nearly got caught!”
This is a dating conversation tip that needs to be used sparingly. If it is used too much it may come across as bragging.
4. Learn to tell stories.
Everyone has interesting stories from their lives. What makes stories interesting? The characters and their details
For Example: Story A: My brother and I nearly got into a fight with these guys a few years back because they thought we were stealing their car, turns out they mistook our car for theirs.
Story B: My Brother and I got into a fight with these guys a few years back. It was hilarious. My brother is like 6′ 5″ and 300 pounds, and these rednecks were both under 5′ 10″. What were they thinking? They even had mullets and wrestling tank tops. They must have been the only guys I have ever seen in New York with mullets and those dumb tank tanks! Seriously have you ever seen a guy in New York with a mullet and wrestling tank top? Anyway these guys thought we were stealing their car. I asked them what their license number was. They got super embarrassed when they realized it was my car. Crazy, huh?
Sometimes you may go into too many details in the story and it may become boring, so make sure to check to see if your date is interested by the story
Note: This is not just a dating conversation tip, this is a conversation tip you can use at work and when telling stories to friends.
5. Topics to avoid
These might seem like obvious dating conversation tips, but some people still use them!
a. The Weather
b. Bad Relationships in the past(other dates/your family/friends)
c. Very deep issues in your life (until you get to know your date better)
This list could contain 100 items, these are just examples of topics that lead to awkward conversations
6. Great conversation topics
a. Celebrities and their drama
b. Fun, cool or interesting things you have done lately
7. Don’t desperately grasp for commonalities with your date.
It’s cool if you both genuinely have something in common. But do not ask 10 questions in a row (or make 10 statements in a row!) to see if you have something in common. Just wait until something comes up during the natural course of the conversation.
8. “Go First!”
If your date is being really quiet and not opening up, you can answer the question that you just asked first.
Sounds crazy, right?
It’s the simple concept of reciprocity. If you tell someone about your car first, they are more likely to tell you about their car.
Example You: “What do you do when you’re not going on dates with cute guys like me?” Her: “I’m not sure”
… luckily we remember ‘Go First!’ You: “because I like to have fun with my friends and go out to clubbing on the weekends but I also really like chilling and watching DVDs.” Your date will then be more likely to contribute to the conversation
9. You don’t need to solve all her problems.
Only for the guys. Sorry girls!
This is where a lot of guys screw up.
She might start telling you about how she got really angry at her friend and doesn’t know how to patch it up.
Or how she hates her parents because they are always trying to get her to go on a date with a neighbor.
As guys, we think like this…
There is a problem—–> We need to solve it
Girls are different. A lot of the time, they just need someone to tell their problem to and don’t actually want your advice. They just want someone to listen.
Girls think like this
There is a problem—–> I just need someone to listen. I don’t care if the problem gets solved.
Does this mean, ‘I should become a girls emotional blanket’?